buat kira odit....

waaa....sepagi-pagi aku telah bersiap utk pergi ke tempat kerja......tapi aku sempat nenok tv cerita dragon ball gt (jangan memikir yg bukan lak...) biasanya aku gi kerja awal.....aku sampai kul 10 pagi...dan aku buka casher lak.....pos A pagi nie masing2 staff buat odit le........
Tgh hari aku staff lain rasa kebuluran nak makan la......aku suruh abang man belikan kat restoran kajang yang dicadang oleh shima.....aku rasa beli nasi ayam ajer....air minuman ada di stesen......aku makan lambat selepas close casher pada jam 2.40 ptg dan di ganti oleh hasni.......masa tu aku gi buat deeping minyak berapa yang masih ada......kalau nak ikut aku buat ikut suka hati aku.......tak boleh le buat macam tu....tempat kerja aku nie.....
Tepat kul 3 ptg aku baru nak makan nasi ayam le.....waktu itu staff dok sibuk buat odit le...aku pun melantang dalam stor sorang diri maa......abis makan aku cabut le....aku tgk baru hari ni hujan lebat sikit kira ok la....sejuk banyak waktu petang nanti.......aku pun masuk balik dalm 30 minit aje.....dan tolong jaga casher member aku,beberapa jam saja........tuk...tek...tuk...menekan butang utk diniagakan.....ramai sungguh orang yang beli prepaid hari ni.....sampai tak cukup tangan nak pegang skang nie......sampai kelam-kabut aku di buatnya......aarrghhhh.....bengang pun ada la........sakit hati pun ade la.......ikut suka hati aku nak marahkan orang tu kot......
Jam dah tunjuk kul 6 ptg......arfan tanya, ham balik kul berapa? aku jawab `ko nak aku balik kul 6.30 ptg ni." kemudian boss aku pun menyapok kat arfan, ham balik awal.lagi pun staff kat stesen dah ramai nie....balik la umah......dengan lajunya aku pun cabut lari.....tapi yang tak puas hati staff wanita usha aku nak marah aje........biasa 2bulan pas mereka balik awal la.....aku tak jeles pun.....kalau sorang tu balik awal.....semua pun nak balik awal la.....kekekeke....padan muka la......aku dah penat giler.....berdiri aje cam batu nisan.....oleh itu aku pun start engin kereta parking kat pump minyak isikan minyak hanya $8 aje utk di pakai seminggu aje.....kemudian memecut kelajuan kereta kuning 800 paling maksim 80km/j......
Sampai umah sempat nenok tv doreamon lak.....abis aje aku gi mandi dan terus tido....memandangkan mataku dah mula kelip.......aku pun start tido kul 8 malam.......apa lagi tido la.....

senarai nama staff petronas usj 6

kebanyakan yang berlaku di tempat kerja aku.....telah ditetapkan adalah nama masing aku diubahkan.....apa terjadinya panggilan direka ciptakan oleh kawan ku....ditaja oleh abg din sendirian berhad......

1. shima = shimau atau harimau.
2. miera = pendek atau loud speaking..
3. arfan = datuk bandar atau cirfan
4. ahmad = pak cik mad
5. teoh = u.teoh atau jet li.
6. iqbal = itik atau pendek ke-1
7. joe = superjoe.
8. azaman = mantor..
9. izham = hamster dan lain lagi aku tak nak sebut lagi....

kesemuanya ada sembilan orang sajer yang masih menetap di stesen petronas usj 6......kalau ada masa datanglah berjumpa dgn mereka semuanya........kami dialu-alukan mereka yang datang ke tempat ni......

sekian terima kasih.....

SHE WILL BE LOVED

Beauty queen of only eighteen
She had some trouble with herself
He was always there to help her
She always belonged to someone else
I drove for miles and miles
And wound up at your door
I've had you so many times but somehow
I want more
I don't mind spending everyday
Out on your corner in the pouring rain
Look for the girl with the broken smile
Ask her if she wants to stay awhile
And she will be loved
She will be loved
Tap on my window knock on my door
I want to make you feel beautiful
I know I tend to get so insecure
It doesn't matter anymore
It's not always rainbows and butterflies
It's compromise that moves us along
My heart is full and my door's always open
You can come anytime you want
I don't mind spending everyday
Out on your corner in the pouring rain
Look for the girl with the broken smile
Ask her if she wants to stay awhile
And she will be loved
She will be loved
I know where you hide
Alone in your car
Know all of the things that make you who you are
I know that goodbye means nothing at all
Comes back and begs me to catch her every time she falls
Tap on my window knock on my door
I want to make you feel beautiful
I don't mind spending everyday
Out on your corner in the pouring rain
Look for the girl with the broken smile
Ask her if she wants to stay awhile
And she will be loved
And she will be loved
And she will be loved
And she will be loved
[in the background]
Please don't try so hard to say goodbye
Please don't try so hard to say goodbye
Yeah
[softly]
I don't mind spending everyday
Out on your corner in the pouring rain
Try so hard to say goodbye
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geovisit();

lepak sjmc

Sesudah abis kerja kat petronas aku.........gerak gi rumah wan......memakan masa 20 minit aje.........sampai aku sembang dgn wan la malam tu........lepas tu aku jumpa dgn azmir balik umah....tak tau dia luar maner lak.......aku rasa aweknya tolong hantar balaknya kat umah....kira bagus la tu....cukup minggu khawin aje.......ada ( xpdc TEMAN lagu.)

aku lepak lama gak.....1 jam oit......aku tunggu sepupu aku nie.....waaaaa mata dah ngatuk ni....maner dia ni.....datang ke x hadir kot......sebab aku nak mesyuarat le.....waaaa cam dok buat bisnes la.......gua tak mampu maaaa.....bincang aku nak belanja 4 orang le gi chicken house le....kat subang piramid........tak tau harga dah naik ke blum......aku pun order makan roti bawang aje 3 orang order minum......kemudian sembang sambil nenok tv astro malam tu......aku pun layan gak.......1/2 jam aku pun bersurai hantar gergasi2 ke umah wan......

seketika itu ade beberapa member buat lawak bodoh lak........tepat kul 1.45 pagi aku pun blah aje.....sampai aje umah kul 2 pagi le.....mata dah ngatuk nie.....salin pakai terus tido aje.....menguap mulut dah seratus kali aje.....apa lagi gi....tak larat nak layan taip komputer nie...

kerja dan rehat le....

ari rabu nie aku masuk awal sikit.....tgk stesen minyak la.....sbb nak gaji nak ambil la.....tapi aku x pasti le boss nak bagi kot le......pagi aku jaga luar aje......kot ptg sikit aku jaga casher le.....pagi nie sorang staff partner warehouse kena tahan kerana bawa van cam f1 le......kena tahan dgn pak polis traffic le....(padan muka staff dia kena saman) dan mula takut le 2...

aku hari ni lepak kat stesen sampai kul 3ptg masuk casher dan niaga le......ramai gak yg datang beli air hari ni......waaaaa terbakar le.....dah lapar ni....terpaksa makan tgh kul 4 ptg......minah ni nak balik makan lak.........aku dan hasni aje.....sembang bab soal cinta lak.....boring lak....ramainya ptg beli air lak.....dahaga yg amat le.....

tepat kul 4 ptg aku gerak gi makan kat usj 7 .belakang metrobus.......makan ikut suka hati aku le.....ayam rendang dan paru goreng last air limau ais........makan ikut nafsu le...... rehat aku 1 jam le.....sembang abg bob le.......lama tak jumpa lak 2........rasa cam 7 bulan lak........sembang tu sampai lupa balik kerja .........waaaaa sampai aje ramai gak guna kad hari ni.......kekurangan orang staff hari sebab sorang tu mulut besar la....malu nak jumpa dgn orang la.....dah 2 kai tak datang lak......geram lak......nasib baik tak boss aku tak kerja banyak lak......arghhhhh......

tepat kul 7 mlm aku bersiap nak pulang ke umah lak.......hari bertuah gak sebabnya tak short lak.....cam tak percaya dapat kosong le.......banyak customer minta harga murah le........ingat apa kedai mamak ke ........jangan harap nak murah le......datang harganya begitu......apa yg mangkuk le.....mood baik hari ni......kalau tak karate tengkorak kepolo......oklah aku malas nak tulis ni .....aku gerak gi ke usj 4 beli majalah jejak wira la......dok sambil maknan hot dog harga $2.00 aje....aku selalu datang kat sana la....lepak sampai tak de orang datang tempatnya...oklah aku dah ngatuk ni nak tido besok masuk kerja ptg lak......aku gerak masuk bilik ni.....babai....

WOMEN AND SEX

WOMEN AND SEX

70% of women who smoke have had more than 4 lovers in thelast year while 60% of female non-smokers had none.Women who respond to sex surveys in mags like Cosmo may have5 times as many lovers as typical women.Women who read romance novels have sex twice as often asthose who don't.

Women with a Ph.D. are twice as likely to be turned on bythe thought of anonymous sex as women who never got a bachelor's degree.Women who went to college are more likely to enjoy oral sex (giving andreceiving) than high school dropouts.National birthrates rise and fall with the height of heels.In a bar or nightclub, the hemlines and necklines of unaccompanied womenrise and fall (respectively) during ovulation.

Women who have a positive attitude towards sex tend to be lessachievement oriented.White teenage girls who live with single mothers are 60% more likely tohave sex before the age of 18 than those who live with both parents.

Thepercentage is much lower for black girls.Women who lost their virginity before their 18th birthdayare likely to be twice as sexually active as women who don't.Atheists, non-Christians and Jews are tend to be more sexually activethan practicing Christians.Women who have spent a night in jail are almost 50% morelikely to have had more than 10 lovers in the past yearthan women with no criminal record.Australian women are more likely to have sex on the first date.Latino women have sex more often than either Blacks or Whites, who getdown at roughly the same rate.Black women are 50% more likely than White women to come every time theyhave sex.White women, especially those with a college degree, are the mostreceptive to anal sex.20% of women who live with their boyfriends have more thanone sex partner.So, you know what this means?

Yup...all you guys have to go looking for:A 1/4 Aussie/1/4 Latino/1/4 Black/1/4 White Atheist with a Ph.D.,wearing a low neckline and high heels during happy hour in a swanky bar,smokes, has a criminal record, reads Cosmo and Barbara Cartland, and wholived with her single mom! Shouldn't be too hard.

Happy hunting.
__________________

BORING LA.....

kerja aku makin hari makin lebihkan o.t. aje.....tapikan gaji tak pun naik gak.....tension giler......ptg nie....ada lori datang hantar minyak primax lak......aku gak yg turun padang lagi.....kalau aku ada hikmat meringan badan kan best la....aku pun malas nak buat kerja kat petronas nie.....macam yang berlaku nie....staff tak cukup le......bos aku balik awal lakk....gaji tak kira lagi.....aku tau gaji tak kira lagi......masuk nie aku dah mula sakit badan lak.....nak demam lak......

aku dah muak nie.....tentang ni....bagaimana pun aku dok relaks le.....cam biasa aje.....tapi bengang nie......malam aku sembang dengan arfan......kawan yang faham tentang aku le....amik berat gak.....hujung bulan nie aku ank berhenti le....sebab aku kerja nie tak de spm lak....tentang komputer aku tak kisah le....nak ajar 2 minah nie....sori le...nak aku tolong le....boring giler cam babi aje.......`walaupun aku tak akan cerita tentang dua ekor minah nie.....tiap petang telepon balak aje.....kalau aku report kat boss.....nanti kaki report lak.....muak aku tgk perangai budak ni...arghhhhhh...

aku balik badan dah penat giler....bertambah keletihan dah......seluruh badan letih lesu......waaaaaaaa.......nak tido.........babai

oklah malam ni aku lepak kat gerai burger hilang penat le.......

=pesanan.....kata orang kerja tu buat terbaik le.....jangan melencong ke tempat lain.....call waktu time ke....tak patuh le....nasihat dari aku ni...

hari paling boring leeee....

hari ni aku pun bangun awal laaaaa.....kul 8.30 pagi siap gi kerja maaa....gerak gi kerja la.....sampai aje buat kerja susun barang la.....waaa terbakar nampak barang sampai banyaknya......mati aku hari ni buat kerja lebih nie.....gaji aku masih kurang gak.......tengok le cukup bulan aku nak chow la.....malas nak kerja la......bye la petronas.....

aku kerja kat petronas dah dekat setahun 9 bulan 28 hari 8 jam 54minit 97864 saat dah.....banyak sungguh le.......hujung bulan ni aku tulis surat la....biar terkejut banyak.....maner ada sikit2 le......kerja non-stop le.....

petang aku gi kuar balik umah makan le.....lapar giler.....tapi aku cari makan takde lak....kalau makan kat kedai dah kena bayar lak......duit dah kering ni.....gaji lambat kuar tu.....arrrggggh...tension giler....dok umah pun member adik aku datang ni nak jumpa lak....tentang komputer le......tak pe hilang boring nie......balik ke kerja kul 4.12 ptg ni......

masuk aje kena layan pelanggan tu.....ramai yg nak beli top-up le.....tapi kredit dalam e-pay tak cukup lak.....kena bgtau kat pelanggan yg e-pay ada promble aje.....aku punya partner casher shima lak.....biasa dia tu supevisor baru le.....tapi ada promble....baru masuk kerja kul 12 tgh hari dah penat le.......apa yg penat le....tak tau le....malas nak cerita kata aku umpat le.....dapat dosa free la......tepat kul 5.45 ptg lori primax datang le......terpaksa aku buat kerja aku pun.....bertanbah la kerja aku lagi......turun minyak waaaa.......sedang aku pasang paip hos tadi aku tgk driver lori bengis la.....takut aku tgk.....cam sang harimau le...x cakap le sampai abis minyak turun kesemuanya....

tiap kali aku asyik turun minyak primax le.....muka aku yg selalu di tayang aje....arghhhhh...tension giler......tepat kul 7.45 mlm aku pun siap collect duit kat casher le.....balik pun kul 8 mlm le.....tapi lepak kat tepi jalan sembang uncle taza dalam hp lak.....yg tentang minyak primax baru ade promble lak........ramai orang cakap minyak cepat telan la....cam minum air lak....aku pun tak tau tentang tu.......`entah le" gi mampus aje....

kuar aku lepak kat gerai jual burger le....makan hot dog special le.....harga $3 aje....kira ok la......samapi ke kul 9.30 mlm......mata dah ngantuk ni.....apa lagi tarik selimut utk tido le....ok selamat malam aje......

open house kat damasara member wan....

waaaa selamat hari raya qurban......

pagi masuk keja.......kuar keja kul 3 ptg........sampai umah kul 3.20 ptg......aku pun terus ke bilik dan siap gi umah wan lak........hari ni gi umah wan le.....ari ni panas terik le......aku minum kat 3 botol besar le......waaaa panas......cam ari nak kiamat lak......samapi kat umah wan.....lepak 1 jam le......tunggu wan siap le.......datang le 2 orang member balik ke kelas.....layan sekejap le.......buat lawak cipan le......

aku buat bodoh dgn ali dan azmir le.......biasa masing buat lawak cipan la.....aku pun buka (hikmat kera peringkat biru).....cukup masa aku dan wan pun blah gi damansara le....dalam perjalanan tu aku pun pandu dgn berhemat le.....kena ikut undang2 jalan raya lak.....mana le tau kot terserempat tok lis le....kena saman la....aku mana ada duit maa.....nangis aku nanti.

jauh gak perjalanan nak gi ke sana tu.....rasa nak tido le.....aku suruh wan buat cerita bodoh dalam keta suzuki 800 aku lak.....ikut hati aku nak berhenti kereta suruh wan jalan kaki aje......tapi dia tu sepupu paling rapat le....nasib aku baik le.....tak terbakar le....sampai aje....kite sesat le.....kat projek lak.....wan call member dulu......

2 minit wan pun nampak member naik motor le.....kira jalan le......aku pandu dgn slow masa tu......pastu aku dan wan lepak kat tingkat 3 naik pakai hikmat ringan badan peringkat 3 aje......aku lepak lama gak sampai malam gak......makan minum dan sewaktu dgnnya.....abis aje....aku pun chow le.....

balik umah kul 11 mlm la.....aku ngatuk suntuk hari gi jalan ke sana......

mata pun dalam lelap nie......gi tido besok keja.....waaaa....

*kepada korang ikutlah teladan seorang kawan membernya...